In a recent study, researchers discovered that women spend about three times as many hours per week performing household chores in comparison to men.
Some women are fortunate enough to have husbands who actually don’t mind assisting them around the house. On the contrary, some women’s husbands contend that being the bread winner automatically excludes them from these responsibilities.
No matter which category your spouse falls into, it can be pretty frustrating when the bulk of the chores fall on you.
Does this sound familiar? Are you tired of washing dishes, folding towels, and scrubbing toilets all by yourself?
If so, I am sure you wouldn’t be shocked to know you are not alone.
Each month, I get a ton of emails from women who feel the exact same way. They are frustrated with their current situations and they just want to know, what is the best way to get your husband to help out more around the house?
Well to be honest, this answer varies depending on the individual. Normally, a man’s upbringing plays a huge role.
For example, if he grew up without having to be responsible for chores around the house, it is likely it does not feel like he is doing anything wrong when he doesn’t assist you.
One thing is for sure: you won’t get him to help out more by nagging and complaining.
Here are a few things you can do to get your husband to help out more around the house:
Ask instead of telling
Men hate it when you talk to them like you are their mother. When you demand your husband takes out the trash or scrubs the floors, it can easily make him feel like you are treating him like a child. Instead of making demands, try asking politely.
Adjust your choice of words
Use the word “would” instead of “could”. If you ask him if he could paint the garage, you open the door for him to reject your question. Of course he could do it, but it is not something he is really interested in doing. Substituting “could” with “would” instantly removes the opportunity for him to think on whether or not he wants to complete the task.
Show sincere appreciation
Think about how good you feel when he does something to show you he cares. Despite what you may think, men want to feel like you care too. Show sincere appreciation during the times he helps out and it will motivate him to voluntarily assist in the future.
Try making a list
Some guys just need you to make a list so they know exactly what needs to be done. He may see the clothes need to be washed, but he also knows you have a panic attack if you don’t wash them in your own special way. Instead of making you angry because he did not separate the whites from the colored clothing, he just leaves them for you to do later.
By using a list, your husband will know exactly what he needs to do to make you happy. It is likely he will try to complete the list as fast as possible, especially if you throw in a little incentive. A list can also help keep a man focused because men aren’t able to multi-task nearly as well as women, and putting too much on his plate at once can overwhelm him if it’s not written down.
While your man isn’t likely to take over all the chores anytime soon, getting your husband to help out around the house more is totally possible with just a few small changes in how you approach him with your “hunny-do” list!